A modern woman-of-the-world discovers that she is no longer a spring chicken

From Robin Korth, an “international speaker and writer” (h/t Chateau Heartiste):

“And so, we planned a weekend together. That's when things got confusing, unspoken and just-not-quite there. We went to bed in a couple's way -- unclothed and touching -- all parts near. Kisses were shared and sleep came in hugs. I attempted more intimacy throughout the weekend and was deterred each time.

On Monday evening over the phone, I asked this man who had shared my bed for three nights running why we had not made love. "Your body is too wrinkly," he said without a pause. "I have spoiled myself over the years with young woman. I just can't get excited with you. I love your energy and your laughter. I like your head and your heart. But, I just can't deal with your body."

I was stunned. The hurt would come later. I asked him slowly and carefully if he found my body hard to look at. He said yes. "So, this means seeing me naked was troublesome to you?" I asked. He told me he had just looked away. And when the lights were out, he pretended my body was younger -- that I was younger. My breath came deep and full as I processed this information. My face blazed as I felt embarrassed and shamed by memories of my easy nakedness with him in days just passed. 

We talked for some time more, my head reeling at the content of the conversation. He spoke of special stockings and clothing that would "hide" my years. He blithely told me he loved "little black dresses" and strappy shoes. He said my hair was not long and flowing as he preferred, but that was okay because it was "cool looking." I felt like a Barbie Doll on acid as I listened to this man. He was totally oblivious to the viciousness of his words.”

You know what? I gotta think that Korth’s boyfriend’s reaction wouldn’t have been news to a more traditional woman.

Before the sexual revolution of the 1960’s upended millennia of wisdom about human relations, wisdom encoded in our customs and tradition, people were less clued out about how human nature worked. Specifically, it was widely understood that men are sexually attracted primarily to women of child-bearing age. The more fertile they are, the sexier they will seem – for reasons that were too obvious to mention in an age when people understood that the primary purpose of sex is reproduction.

Among the embedded knowledge, was the understanding that a woman’s best strategy is to snag the best man she can while her looks are in their prime, marry him and raise his children. That way, when her looks fade, it doesn’t matter; she is the established matriarch of her family by then.

But the utopians of the 1960’s had a problem with this. The life-arc from girl to hot-young-thing to mother to matron was too stifling. Something more liberating was required. So the illusion that people aren’t limited by their biology was invented. You want to be fancy-free and sexy. Sure. No problem. Shake your booty until you’re dead. 

The only problem? Biology is more real than ivory tower assumptions. If you ignore biology, you wind up with suboptimal results. A perfect example of this is found in the following comment to Korth’s article:

“I've wasted decades as my worst enemy & searching for men's approval. Something happened in my late 40's, I decided I'd rather be ‘alone’ and content than with someone searching for perfection.”

In other words, she wasted her best years partying and now that she is in her late 40’s, she discovers – too late – that she is no longer a sex kitten and doesn’t have the options she once did. Unfortunately for her, Mr. Right ain’t interested anymore. This commenter - and Robin Korth - are the victims of modern feminism. 

These are needless, self-inflicted tragedies, and they happen when people follow the false promise of utopian dreams. There is only one reality. And all we can do is make the best of our worldly existence… and not try to lead others astray.

When Susan Patton, a Princeton grad, made the same point in an open letter to the Daily Princetonian, there were howls of outrage from the usual suspects. But she nevertheless became famous as a result and has published a dating manual called “Marry Smart”. According to the New York Post: 

“The book argues that coeds have a limited shelf life ‘as young, beautiful [women who are] as attractive to men or as fertile’ and advises them to spend three-quarters of their time in school on the hunt for Mr. Right.”

I guess some people out there are beginning to get past the wishful thinking.

Comments

[chaos111_99]

And it is going to get worse

The Complacent Generation: Raised on the hollow dreams of reality TV, egos bloated by social media, today's 20-somethings expect success with no effort, says PATRICK STRUDWICK. And it can only end in tears

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2724209/The-Complacent-Generation-Raised-hollow-dreams-reality-TV-egos-bloated-social-media-today-s-20-somethings-expect-success-no-effort-says-PATRICK-STRUDWICK-And-end-tears.html

[oldwhiteguy]

what gets me is that these people are really stupid. I am an old man as my nom de quare says. I have had the same wife for a very long time now. sometimes things work and sometimes they don't as we age. a reasonably intelligent person would know this. part of our life cycle. check out the word love.

[Nicola Timmerman]

Except even the young women seem to have a hard time getting the men excited these days as they are spending too much time watching porn on the internet!

[WiseGuy]

She should have listened to Avril Levigne's song "Sk8er Boi". Then she would have at least had a tiny chance that her worthless, loser boyfriend from her youth may have struck success on MTV, rather than being old and alone.

And you thought that song was worthless.

[Arty]

It's only going to get worse for Ms Korth

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2722779/Japans-sex-doll-industry-reaches-level-creation-perfect-artificial-1-000-Dutch-Wife-comes-realistic-feeling-skin.html